If I Could Turn Back Time....

If I could turn back time, I wouldn't mind going through SPM over again, I would mind sitting for Form 4 final exam over again, I wouldn't mind sitting for PMR over again. As long as I can tell her how I felt that time. I was a fool that time, I was naive, I was stupid and I was an idiot for letting all the time I could have done it slipped past through my fingers.

But now, it is all too late, I have lost my chances, I too have lost my confidence. How hard is it to let go something important? How long will I continue to be a fool, naive, stupid and idiotic? How long till I can deprive myself of my emotions?

With YTN loan pressure now hanging upon me, the load have increased. I do not know how long I can last nor when I will crack. My time to fool around is limited. Time never cease going forward, it never stops. I too wish I can move onwards, I am pulling myself backwards. 

One thing I learned from this experience, love is an illusion created by the heart of human in the wish for companionship. As long as I can eliminate the feelings for companionship, I can eradicate my feelings of love.

I know you are always reading my posts. Therefore, I want you to know, that no matter what, you are still someone irreplaceable to me. When times get hard for you, I will ALWAYS be there for you, I swear it on my blood....

To hell with my feelings.....farewell.....